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I’ve never actually celebrated Valentines day, ie. I have never been in a relationship on Valentines Day, nor have I ever asked a girl to a dinner date on this fabled day. To this day, the nuances of Valentines Day still escape me.
Unfortunately, I’ll have to wait another year before I can celebrate Valentines Day with someone I love. For those who haven’t read the previous update, my girlfriend is currently really busy moving into her new place in Melbourne. She’s had to rush around every day, sorting out banks, driving licence, accommodation and hundreds of other things you need to sort out before University starts.
She had been staying at her old house, where they didn’t have an internet connection. Her parents live in Indonesia, where the Dad does civil engineering stuff and builds big buildings and makes lots of moolah $$. The lack of internet meant that she had to rely on her mobile data, so in order to save data, we have been unable to Skype. Its just been 5 to 10 minutes on Facebook call a day, when she wakes up and before she sleeps. But i’m thankful that we could even talk. Its been quite nice hearing what shes been up to, the struggles, the fun parts, and it really makes me feel like I’m a part of her life.
Anyway, today she moved into her halls for real, and she’s had a pretty busy day, moving in, trying to make friends, unpacking everything, all the things I had to do when I first went to University. I understood all this, so I told her we could always have a “date” another time, because I wanted her to make friends and meet the people she would be living with. Nevertheless, she called me on Skype and I watched as she unpacked her stuff and we had our first proper skype session. She said that at 20:00, there was some big hall event, where everyone tries to make friends and get to know each other, so we ended the call.
I had breakfast and was starting to do some work when at about 20:30 Melbourne time (09:30 GMT), I get a call from my girlfriend on Skype. I pick up and there she was lying on the bed, hidden under the covers so I could only see her forehead and her eyes. I asked her why she wasn’t at the event, and she told me that she didn’t go because she felt intimidated by everyone, and she was too shy.
She’s always been a shy, quite girl, the complete opposite of the loud, cocky, egoistic guy that I was. But being with her has made me realize that whenever I was loud and overbearing, people like her felt intimidated. So now I’ve toned down, and I try to be more considerate of others.
So she stayed in the room and called me, and we just called and spent some time together. It was too late in the evening to start a movie, and she was tired from all the moving in, so we just sat there and cuddled (virtually!) Eventually, she fell asleep and I had a 1 hour nap in the middle of the day so we could “Skype Sleep”.
It’s now 16:30 GMT and my girlfriend is still sleeping. Watching her sleep makes me really miss her. Cuddling with her, kissing her, whatever, all kinds of cute shit I do when i’m with her. This 11 hour time difference is hard, but I honestly don’t mind it. It gives me time to focus on work and my own life, and it gives her space to do her own things. It doesnt mean I miss her any less though 😦
However, good news; I will be seeing her this March! Every year, I get travel money from my Dad’s job to go visit the family. The most expensive part of the flight is the flight from London to South East Asia. By using this travel money, I save loads! I also get to visit my parents in Brunei. My girlfriend will also visit her parents in Jakarta, so we will meet up there, just like in the winter break!
- 23rd March: Fly London To Brunei (Where my parents live)
- 24th March: Arrive in Brunei, stay overnight with my parents
- 25th March: Fly to Jakarta (Indonesia)
- 26th March: Reunited!!!!!
You might be wondering why I’m not seeing her until the 26th. I arrive on the 25th, can’t I go see her then? Well two things really:
- I need a day where I sort out an Internship I plan on doing at some Oil Company. I need to go visit the office, sort out documents and do a bunch of paperwork. Possibly an interview.
- My girlfriend needs to spend time with her parents. It’s unfair to her mom (who misses her soooooo much) if I show up and essentially steal her daughter away from her. She wants to spend time with Emily as well.
This post turned out quite a bit longer than I expected. Anyway, I’m pretty excited to see her. When we first started LDR I thought we would only see each other one holiday a year, but here we are. I have a countdown on my phone, let me check.
40 Days! That’s literally nothing compared to when we were separated for 5 months. This will be a piece of cake. And this holiday will I guess be our 1 year anniversary holiday, since we are 1 year on March 6th. Can’t wait to see her!
Edit 1: Fuck that gives me 40 days to get into shape. Trying to bulk up but stay lean so i’ve been counting my calories pretty hardcore recently. Been trying to keep the fat to a minimum so I look shredded as fuark!
Edit 2: lmfao, if that doesn’t work out, my girlfriend says she loves me for who I am and not my body anyway 😛
Its 09:11 on a Wednesday and I have a Data Structures and Algorithms lecture at 10 and it takes 45 minutes to get from my flat to Campus because there is no way in HELL I can afford a place closer.
I want to leave but I can’t. I’m rooted to my toilet and I really need to shit but I actually can’t. Fuck LOL.
Anyway, as I sit in a perpetual state of agony, I want to post an update on how things are between me and my girlfriend.
My girlfriend left for Australia about a week ago and is now in Melbourne. She has been really busy, cleaning up the old house, moving in to her dormitory and stuff. As such, we haven’t had much time to talk, since she hasn’t bought a phone number yet, and has no 3G.
The only time we can talk is when she gets back to the hotel she’s staying at with her parents. I’ve been waking up at 6.30 everyday, going to the gym and when I get home, she is online and we squeeze in 30 minutes of skype.
In the evenings, after class, I call her and watch her sleep. I mute myself so I don’t disturb her. When she eventually wakes up, we talk a little as she gets ready and next thing you know, shes gone out for another busy day of moving in.
[Update: I have now left my toilet prison and am on the tube]
But rather than moan about how little time we spend together now, lets look at the positives:
-More time to study. Lately I’ve been staying on campus in the Library or in the Labs and getting some work done.
-More time to gym. I could squeeze in a second workout after class.
-More time to blog about random stuff 🙂
All in all, it’s not too bad. I miss her, she misses me, but this is temporary. Once she’s settled in and follows a routine, we will be able to skype more regularly, catch up on the latest episode of The Flash, Magicians, One Punch Man and other shows I forgot to list.
Also, I think I know what I will make for her 1 Year Anniversary present. It requires some electronics knowledge to make (my specialty), but I know she will absolutely love it!
Being a student, I don’t exactly have an abundance of money. London takes a toll on the wallet, since everything is infinitely more expensive here.
But that doesn’t mean I don’t have enough money to spend on gifts for my girlfriend. I somehow make ends meet and I try to surpise her with a present every 2 months or so.
However, the next month and a bit will be threatening to my bank balance. On January 30th, my girlfriend turns 19. Unfortunately, I won’t be able to celebrate it with her. I actually have never celebrated her birthday with her as my girlfriend. We only started talking last year, and at her 18th we were not dating, yet. But I still got her a pretty sweet gift. She was cute, so I got her a giant teddy bear.
This year however, I wanted to get her something different. She loves music and vinyls, and since shes moving into her University Accomodation, I wanted to get her something that would be practical as well as nice.
If your looking for something nice to get your girlfriend, and your uncreative like me, I would really recommend looking on Etsy. It’s a great website for homemade, handcrafted gifts. I browsed around the site for a bit and eventually found things that interested me.
I decided to get her a few vinyl bookends, so she can organize her new (massive biology) textbooks in her new room.
EDIT: It is now the 30th, and my girlfriend has recieved the present but hasn’t opened them yet. She’s saving it for when she moves in.
After purchasing these, I realized that February 14th was actually just around the corner. Once again, I’ve never had a girlfriend on Valentines day, so I completely forgot about it.
But once again, Etsy came to the rescue. I ended up getting her coasters for her table in her new room. Now your probably thinking, “What’s so special about coasters?”.
These aren’t any old coasters. These are handmade, clay, oven fired coasters which look pretty damn sweet. But what makes them really special is that on the coasters, you can have text from books printed on them.
Now my girlfriend absolutely adores books. Somedays I think she loves her fantasy books more than she loves me. On the other hand, I never read books, unless they supplement my studies, like big, dusty textbooks titled An Introduction to Signals and Communications by some Academic. Pretty boring, I know.
However, I have read some books she recommended to me. Red Rising, by Pierce Brown, was a book I enjoyed. So I took quotes from Red Rising, and several other books and had them printed onto the coasters. I think shes going to love them.
This March, Sunday 6th to be exact, will be our 1 year anniversary. I’m not sure what to get her to be honest. Theres this Harry Potter and the Philosophers Stone book with illustrations that she literally orgasmed over, but I don’t think its enough as a 1 year present. I’ll get that in additon to the real present. But I’m stumped at the moment.
(I hope that is the correct book!)
So if anyone has any cute ideas for a homemade gift for a girl who loves reading fantasy books or listening to pop-punk/emo/*insert obscure genre here* music, please, help me!
When I started my final year of high school, I told myself that I would not actively seek out a relationship. Mainly because I wanted to avoid the tears and heartbreak that would come when the school year ended. Everyone always talks about the difficulties of an LDR, especially during University, when your supposed to be out there, trying to new things, meeting new people 😉 . They say it won’t last, that it will be over within a year and then your fucked. Everyone at Uni has already got a new girl/boy friend and your out there all by yourself. Alone.
So of course, I ignored my own advice and got a girlfriend.
Statistically speaking; I’m an engineer after all, this was an awful decision. Most LDR’s end after 4.5 months, and 40% of LDR’s end in a breakup. This data was taken from this website, which surveyed people in the United States.
When I started University back in October 2015, my girlfriend was on a 6 month break. Australian Universities have different term dates to the ones in the United Kingdom, since their in the southern hemisphere. So their term starts in February and ends in November, when they have their “Summer” break. So she stayed with her parents in Indonesia where her dad works until she would go to University in Melbourne.
This meant that she was at home with a lot of free time, allowing us to Skype. A lot. I would come home from class and call her instantly and just leave the call on even when she slept. She stayed up, consistently, so that we could spend some time together online. Eventually her sleeping pattern shifted so she slept at 2-3AM and woke up at noon everyday, just so she could skype me before I went to class at 8AM GMT.
That’s dedication right there, and thinking about it and typing it up in this post makes me realize how much she cares about me, and how much she missed me in order to do this every single day for 6 months.
We spent Christmas together in Indonesia, I flew over during my 3 week break and stayed with her and her parents. I’ll post about this another time, but in short, it was the best holiday I had been on. Ever.
Now, she’s starting University. My girlfriend is Australian, and will attend a University in Australia. Melbourne to be precise. GMT +11. I on the other hand, currently attend University in London, the UK. Depressing right? An 11 hour difference. That means when I wake up to go to the gym in the morning at 5.45AM, she will be just coming back from class.
I’m excited for her, she got into the degree she wanted to, and she’s so happy about it. I want her to do well. I remember when she first told me I was sleeping but the moment I heard, I was wide awake. I want her to succeed and I want to watch her grow. But why do I have this empty feeling inside of me?
I realize that everything is going to change. We won’t be able to skype each other as much. She’s going to be busy with her own classes and activities. She’s going to meet new people and make new friends. There’s going to be at least 1 buff Aussie dude hitting on her (Aussie dudes are always ripped as hell, like there’s something about Australia, like an aura of gains or something. Man I wish I lived there so I could get that shredded).
I’ve never been a jealous boyfriend, I was always chilled out about her having guy friends but for some reason this started to bother me. Like I’m afraid she will do something. And then it all ends. And I’m here all alone and since University has been going on for quite a while for me, I’ll be out here. Alone.
But how is her going to University any different to me going to University? I’m sure she was worried when I first went off to England. Would I meet another girl and forget about her? Would I cheat on her? No. I’m pretty sure she didn’t think any of these things because she has faith in me. She never doubted me, so why should I doubt her?
So at the end of the day, I need to have faith in her, in our relationship, and I need to believe that we will make it. I also need to try as hard, perhaps even harder than she did during her 6 month break. I need to make an effort to spend time with her. So here is what I will do:
- Wake up early, 5.45AM and go to the gym. When I get back, she should be home from class and call her for 2 hours until I go to class (Sigh.. 9AM lectures).
- During the day, she will be asleep, but send her pictures of what i’m doing.
- When I get home from class at 5-6pm, call her on skype. She will probably still be sleeping but watching her sleep is better than nothing.
- When she wakes up to get ready, talk and make the most of the time we have.
- Get work done and go to sleep by 11pm since I need to gym in the morning (lmao)
Hopefully, by doing this, we can make it
University is about trying new things, meeting new people. People change, but I made this post in order to clear my mind and set things straight. At the end of the day, if shit hits the fan, all we can do is be philosophical about it. That’s life. But what you can’t do is let it ruin your day, because your worried that shit might hit the fan.
Statistically speaking, 60% of LDRs succeed, that’s a majority. I’m an engineer, I like numbers. But I believe in our relationship more than I believe in figures.
I nearly deleted this post by accident after typing it all up, thank god for drafts
This is a continuation of Part 1
So she makes that awful picture her cover photo and we continue to talk to each other. We exchange a few silly pictures over messenger and then I call it a night. Can’t seem too eager right?
But over the next couple of days, I started to message her. A few messages like:
Me: Enoloy? Her: Yeah? Me: You suck Lol Her: Fuk u 0h4
Turned into longer conversations. For some reason, she chatted in some strange dialect, where she removed the vowels from words and used really weird spelling. Let me give you an example:
Her: ez pz Her: 15 in tovtal
And eventually it began to rub off on me too:
Me: Whats wrong? :) :) :) Her: Youo Her: ofor why do we alweys type like retards on fb like look at our whole convo since ever Me: Bevoz we r kewl, i just got cancer reading our chat Her: We are cancer Me: I h8 u :) Her: h8 u 22
But it was pretty cute to be honest. So it grew from just being a few messages a day to the point where I was constantly on my phone sending a message. Like if I had to be completely honest, the volume of messages sent in a typical day then is probably greater than the volume we send today, and we are dating now.
This continues for like two weeks, and I start getting to know her better and I realized that she was pretty cool. I started to regard her more as a friend as opposed to a girl I was attracted to, since she was smart, funny and easy to talk to. I got along with her, and I really enjoyed having her as a friend. Or “frands”, as we called ourselves.
At this point you might think, “Hey did you friendzone her?” and the answer is no, since I don’t think she was attracted to me. Also, earlier on in the year, I made a promise to myself that I would NOT, absolutely NOT, get into a relationship in my final year of high school. I was convinced that it would be an absolute disaster since we were all leaving at the end of the year and I wanted to save myself from that path of death and destruction.
Then she invited me to her 18th birthday party.